No, seriously, you guys, I am like such a good person. Yesterday, I was with Lightweight Paper, Pony Party, and Thought Thief in Huntington Village. (Ed. note: That may just be one of my least favorite places on Long Island. Just, not a fan.) More specifically, outside Wild By Nature. So yeah. Anyway, we're chatting about how they're all leaving for college and Figure It Out, naturally, and this black lady pulls up next to us in her minivan (sad.) You see, she's driving out east and has no money for gas (!) and asks us for some. I was pinned down because I was closest to her and she was LOOKING AT ME THE WHOLE TIME while giving her schpeel (in a Southern accent or maybe she just goes to church in a basement, either-or) and I just wanted her to go away because... (well, you know). Long story short, I, Id A, gave her ten whole U.S. dollars. Right? Like, I know. She told me that God was watching over me and that I was such a "nice young man." SAD! Then this... like the second she put her (sad) minivan back into drive...
Id A: I hope she doesn't buy meth with that.
Pony Party: I guess I've just grown to ignore homeless people.
Lightweight Paper, Thought Thief: Yeah, definitely.
I LOVE US!
No, seriously, get a job poor people. You are gross.
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