Tanning Apparently Makes You More "Entitled", Not "Attractive"

So, as was promised, here is one of my favorite tales from the road. Royale With Cheese tells it almost as good as I do and he wasn't even there.

And that's how this story begins: LEARNING(!). It was early October, the sun was high and the day was that warm where like you could where shorts and a t-shirt but it doesn't feel right because you've been in school for a month and when is actually going to feel like fall so I can stop thinking about summer?

Dad A is with me and we're driving around the "'hood" in his large German car. I'm approaching a stop sign and there are two cars parked on side, I am halfway between them. There is another car parked on the other side of the street. Suddenly, a blue Honda Civic comes ROARING onto the street, almost hitting MY DAD'S CAR. Tan Bitch (early twenties, of course) stops at my window and yells at my mouth "ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED!?" My reply, you ask? "Heyheywoopsokay!" Just like that, like one long word. But then I realized that totally would not have been my fault. Right? Like how was I to avoid that? No possible way, right?

And so, a new catchphrase was born. A new experience had and another person despised. You are that person, Tan Bitch who I am going to assume lives on Birchwood Park Drive. Fuck you.